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Lame Dad Doesn’t Realize How Lucky He Is to Have Chance to Raise His Kids

“They have a very active life style and school. Am I expected to drive them from school and back (two different schools) every morning and night?…”

On the Ottawa Divorce blog a lame Canadian father identified as “double twins father” writes:

[C]an I be forced (in Quebec) to share equal custody of my children?

I will be going through mediation with the mother of my children in a week and having done the calculations (child support + half of all current house expenses) I come up with $1,150 a month for my rent etc!! BTW we both make very good salaries so that was quite a shock!

so the connection? she will expect me to take the kids half of the time, which is a very reasonable assumption. But in Ottawa, I will be lucky to get a bachelor for $800. so I have 4 kids, 4years old and 8 years old (2 sets of twins). I can’t see myself keeping them in what I can afford to live in?!! also, they have a very active life style and school. Am I expected to drive them from school and back (two different schools) every morning and night, because I can expect I will not be on a school bus route? we live in an expensive neighborhood and I won’t be able to rent anywhere close to it.

It just seems that my only options are the weekends? but I don’t know if she will be reasonable about this because she travels on business at least one week out of the month, often two.

of course that’s one solution, I stay at “her” place while she travels. But then I am at her beck and call for her travel agenda, and paying the rent on an apartment I won’t stay in for half the time?

Those aren’t unreasonable considerations, but they certainly aren’t insurmountable, either. It’s hard to respect a guy who doesn’t want to spend a lot of time with his kids if it’s inconvenient or he has to make some hard choices.

This guy has no idea how lucky he is to have an ex who is (apparently) willing to co-parent with him and share custody equally. I get thousands of letters from fathers who would walk through the gates of hell to have shared custody of their children, if only their exes and the family courts would allow it.

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