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Worst Family Law Legislation: Countdown to the Bottom. Who gets Daisy the dog?

As we continue our nationwide contest for “most ridiculous family law bill in the country,’ I am pleased to present the third-worst entry from Massachusetts. The fourth-worst entry was presented yesterday.

I invite your nominations from all states for winner of this contest. The winner will be chosen according to secret criteria that are 100 percent subjective.

(To enter the contest, your email must include the text of the bill, or a link to the text. The bill must be current. Please indicate whether I can use your name as the submitter.)

I now offer:

Massachusetts Doozy Number Three:

“More Restraining Order Follies’     HB 1396 and HB 1546

Under HB 1396, your restraining order could be extended by the court without ever notifying you of the proceeding if you had previously been convicted of violating the order.

So here”s a scenario I guarantee will occur within the first month:

Mom is abusive to the kids and ruthless towards dad. He gets a new girlfriend, so she gets a restraining order against him out of spite, claiming that she is in fear.

 Unfortunately, he is the kids” only protector. One day they text message him that mom is drunk and is hitting them. They beg him to pick them up.  He goes over and calmly and quietly rescues the kids. The DA, naturally, prosecutes dad for violating the restraining order, since he/she is not allowed to use discretion and drop such cases, and wins a conviction.

A year later, mom goes to court under the new bill with no notice to dad, so there is no one to tell the judge about her multiple encounters with the child protection agency for child abuse. Dad has the restraining order against him extended another year in his absence. Meanwhile, the kids are getting the living h… beaten out of them by mom, with no one to protect them. Somehow I don”t see the judge or the social worker or the domestic violence “victim advocate’ being there Saturday evening at 9:00 PM to protect them.

Here”s more:

Under HB 1546, (“The Goldfish Protection Act’) when mom gets the restraining order against him, just to make it smart a little more, she can also take possession of the pets  — his beloved dog Daisy, for instance. Daisy, of course, was his long before he even met her.

Of course, bills like these make some sense if you buy into the vision of a cruel, calculating, implacable, life-threatening batterer. No problemo   — except that the courts utterly fail to make any attempt whatsoever to determine the truth of the matter. This lack of procedural and substantive rights pollutes and corrupts this entire area of law and turns it into tyranny. It is astonishing that our guardians of civil liberties continue, after all these years, to turn a blind eye to this enormous affront to civil rights.

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Which State Will Win Dumbest-Anti-Child-Legislation Gold Medal?

Here are four candidates for the most dubious family bills in the Massachusetts Legislature. We will count down in a series of emails over the next week, beginning with the merely misguided and progressing to the truly Orwellian. These are my Christmas presents to you.

Reading these will hopefully remind you why you need to support Fathers & Families or your local family court reform organization. Who else is going to oppose the lunatics?

I would like to hear from those in other states – tell me about the legislative doozies in your state. Then we will determine the winner of “most ridiculous family law bill in the country.’ The winner will be chosen according to secret criteria that are 100 percent subjective.

(To enter the contest, your email must include the text of the bill, or a link to the text. The bill must be current. Please indicate whether I can use your name as the submitter.)

For our first entry from Massachusetts, I offer:

“Don”t Get in a Car Accident in California’

Massachusetts Doozy Number Four,   HB 113:

OK, so you are happily married and live in Massachusetts and lose your job, so you go to California where you think you have a better shot. On your second day there, you get in a horrendous car wreck and are hospitalized for the next four months. Under HB 113, a court shall issue a warrant for your arrest because you left Massachusetts for over 90 days without making “provisions for the support’ of your spouse.

(The word “shall’ is important because in law, it means that the thing must be done, without room for discretion.)

Yes, that”s right, this law would apply even to marrieds, even without kids. And failing to find a job in California despite best efforts. And falling ill. And working on commissions, which do not arrive in 90 days  — you get the picture.

Naturally, it would also extend to those with child support orders.

So don”t try to better your family”s circumstances by going out of  state  — you might end up in jail if things don”t work out. (This could get bad if the dollar keeps falling and we start going to Mexico for work.)

Presumably, like all family law, this would be applied in a gendered manner, so that women would rarely, if ever, be arrested under its provisions. And speaking of the little woman, this bill seems to assume that she is helpless and cannot support herself while you are gone  — and no exception just because you and she are childless.

Ned Holstein, MD, MS
Executive Director

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Fathers 4 Justice Canada Conducts Protest, Civil Disobedience Campaign

Fathers 4 Justice Canada is sending this Equal Parenting Christmas Card (pictured) to all members of the Canadian Parliament, as well as all Senators and Provincial Premiers. F4J Canada has done a series of highly-publicized stunts and acts of civil disobedience as part of their campaign to protect children’s right to have a relationship with both parents after divorce.

Earlier this month two F4J superheroes–Spiderman and The Hulk–climbed high onto the structure surrounding the Sapperton Skytrain Station in New Westminster, British Columbia. The rush-hour protest was seen by over a million people, as the protesters braved high winds and heavy rains for five hours before giving themselves up to authorities. According to F4J Canada:

“These superheroes are taking action to highlight the plight of children who have been denied their right to the full benefit of both of their parents.”

Some of you may recall F4J Canada’s 2005 “Month of Mayhem.” In a series of spectacular acts of civil disobedience, F4J protesters shut down Montreal Bridge, scaled Mount Royal cross (pictured), took over several other bridges, and forced evacuations of courtrooms. The campaign garnered a great deal of media attention, most of it surprisingly favorable.

F4J Canada works in the tradition of the UK Fathers 4 Justice, led by Matt O’Connor. F4J’s stunts have received worldwide publicity, including the Buckingham Palace protest and David Chick’s heroic six day, one-man protest over Tower Bridge in London. Chick’s protest created 10 mile traffic jams and cost businesses an estimated £50 million. Facing a prison sentence, Chick was acquitted by an English jury, some of whom were reportedly moved to tears by his testimony.

F4J Canada can be reached at office@fathers-4-justice-canada.ca or via their website here. Leaders of the group include:

1) Hal Legere, who scaled the huge, heavily-trafficked Pattullo bridge in Surrey BC, leading authorities to close the bridge for five hours and garnering national publicity.

2) Kris Titus (aka “Wonder Woman”) who helped crash the Ontario Law Society’s Christmas Wine & Dine in 2005 by scaling the building in protest.

3) Rob Robinson (aka “Burnaby Batman”), who launched F4J’s inaugural action by perilously perching on a 200-foot tower crane in downtown Burnaby, British Columbia for 18 hours in protest.

According to Titus (pictured below on a balcony during the Ontario Law Society protest), the group is making significant inroads in Canada’s parliament, and has ambitious plans for 2008.

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Fathers & Families News Digest, 12-18-07

Below are some recent articles and items of interest from Fathers & Families’ latest News Digest.

High court to rule in kidnapping case (The Star-Ledger, 12-12-07)

Idaho judge rules in favor of biological father in American Fork adoption (ABC4.com, 12-12-07)

‘Robin’ of Fathers 4 Justice fails in Supreme Court appeals (The Vancouver Sun, 12-12-07)

Veteran lawmaker ordered to pay $16,000 in late child support (Associated Press, 12-12-07)

Mother loses custody battle for son (Legalbrief Today, 12-13-07)

Court cancels father’s support for ‘special needs’ child (The Morning News, 12-13-07)

Former Bengal settles child support charges (WKRC-TV, 12-14-07)

Ex-girlfriend of falsely jailed man denied 18 years child support (Associated Press, 12-14-07)

Convicted smuggler on run in child support case (The Star, 12-16-07)

When parents divorce but behave like, well, adults (The Vancouver Sun, 12-17-07)

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A Christmas Recommendation for Parents of Small Children

Sadly, this year one of the great joys of Christmas will be gone. My daughter (pictured on her first day of school several years ago) no longer believes in Santa, so she and I can no longer track Santa his journey all over the world via the North American Aerospace Defense Command (pictured). My teenage son has always been very good about helping make Christmas special for his little sister, but this year some rat at her school told her the truth about Santa. It was inevitable, and I never made a great effort to make her believe, but she believed and was happy to do so,
and I was happy to go along. Normally every Christmas Eve she and I get some eggnog and she sits on my lap in front of the computer and we track Santa on his journey. I highly recommend it for all parents of small children. To see what NORAD does, click here and check out the video below. On Christmas Eve, go to http://www.noradsanta.org/en/home.htm. They currently have some children’s activities and pretty pictures there, so it wouldn’t be a bad idea to introduce it to your child now. [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jPwuGud1tC0&NR=1]

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Are You a Military Father Who Has Struggled to Stay in Your Children’s Lives?

We’ve often discussed the problems faced by divorced fathers who serve in the military–to learn more, see my co-authored column Protect Deployed Parents” Rights (Trenton Times & others, 11/9/06). Lloyd, a reader and military serviceman, writes: “Glenn, I found this on the ‘Army Knowledge Online’ website, where my military e-mail account is. It’s the ‘National Fatherhood Initiative/Lockheed-Martin Military Father of the Year’ award, and they are taking nominations. The deadline is January 4, 2008. Perhaps there’s a chance to recognize a military father who has struggled but managed to maintain his relationship with his children post-divorce?”
The announcement, which can be found here, is below. While we’re on the subject of military dads, make sure to take a moment to watch one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen at Soldier”s Home: Tearful Reunion as Sailor Returns from Iraq, Surprises Little Son in Class. The National Fatherhood Initiative (NFI) is seeking nominations of outstanding military fathers to be considered for the 2008 NFI Lockheed Martin Military Fatherhood Award™. The Awardee and his family will be honored at the 2008 NFI Fatherhood Awards™ Gala, to be held in Washington D.C. on April 29, 2008. SUBMIT TO: militaryfa@fatherhood.org DEADLINE: January 4, 2008 Know a military father who deserves a Fatherhood Award™? Please send a brief, 1-2 page explanation that shows how this father meets most or all of the following criteria: Ongoing commitment and dedication to his children Extraordinary efforts to father from a distance during military separation Successfully balancing military life and fathering role Efforts to mentor/strengthen other military fathers and/or military children who are separated from their fathers Nominee must be nominated by someone other than himself Nominations must also include:

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Did Child Support Enforcement Help Drive this Innocent Father to His Death?

Those who suffer from child support enforcement’s abuses and errors lead difficult and stressful lives. Sadly, child support enforcement abuses may have contributed to the recent heart attack and death of an English father. All in the best interests of his child, of course.

From the Equal Parenting Alliance:

EPA Soldier dies in war on fathers
Sunday 9th December 2007

Last Thursday, 9th December, 36 year-old veteran soldier Lee Wilkins died while out running. He survived action in Northern Ireland, but those who knew him well believe it was the battles he had with Family Courts and the Child Support Agency which killed him.

His son lived with him, and in these circumstances, one wonders why the CSA were hounding him to pay them £650, instead of paying money to him. Lee could not understand this either, and we saw the increasing stress which this alleged debt, and the threat of bailiffs caused him. Now that he has died, the CSA will be
able to access the money from his estate, under draconian regulations proposed this year to pursue dead fathers beyond the grave.

Earlier this year, Lee asked the Equal Parenting Alliance to post this mini-biography of him and his fight with the CSA. Sadly, it was a fight which led was to lead to his death – a soldier who fought bravely for his country and survived, but could not survive this country’s war on fathers. His son, whom he always wished should not be named in publicity, now has to face a future without him.

CSA Incompetence Harms Children
22nd March 2007

Sometimes it takes a single story to illustrate the flaws in a system.

Lee Wilkins is a veteran soldier who lives with his 9 year-old son in Coventry. He obtained a degree in photography after leaving the army, and many of his impressive pictures have been exhibited in the Imperial War Museum. He hopes one day to work as a photographer in war-zones and the like, but for now, he is happy to just be a dad to his boy.

Although separated, Lee and his ex-partner have supported their son financially without involving the Child Support Agency for many years now, and so it came as a bolt from the blue when Lee received a demand for £650 from the CSA, followed by the threat of bailiffs if he did not pay up.

” I couldn’t understand it,” said Lee. “My boy lives with me nearly all the time now, and the money they wanted from me wasn’t for his mum, anyway. They were going to keep it themselves! I thought the CSA were supposed to give money to parents who are looking after children, not take it off them.”

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More Progress on the Male Birth Control Pill

Background: I’ve long believed that a male birth control pill would be a great thing for men, and that women might not be as happy about it as they may claim. In my column Do Women Really Want a Male Birth Control Pill? (Newsday, 4/11/05), I wrote:

“Women have long lamented the unequal burden they shoulder in the area of contraception. Today researchers are reportedly moving closer to perfecting a male contraceptive that is free of side effects, easy to take, and reversible. But do women really want a male birth control pill?

“Power is the reward which comes with responsibility. For example, during the Cold War Americans complained about the money and manpower spent protecting a reputedly ungrateful world from communism. Yet these sacrifices also helped give the United States great geopolitical power, with its attendant perks and privileges.

“Similarly, while women legitimately complain that biology has condemned them to bear the burden of contraception, this burden also gives women control over one of the most important parts of any human being”s life–reproduction. The male birth control pill will shift much of that control from women to men. Is the following conversation far away?

“Woman #1: ‘My [husband, boyfriend, significant other] is selfish. He’s on the pill and won”t get off. I”ve asked him to stop taking it but he always says he”s not ready. He just won”t grow up. I don”t know what to do.’

“Woman #2: ‘That”s what the pill has given men–a right to be perpetual adolescents. It”s given them veto power over women who want to have children’…

“While most women are responsible and want to have children with a willing, committed partner, studies show that lack of reproductive control can be a major problem for men today. For example, the National Scruples and Lies Survey 2004 polled 5,000 women in the United Kingdom for That”s Life! magazine. According to that survey, 42% of women claim they would lie about contraception in order to get pregnant, regardless of the wishes of their partners…

“The advent of the female birth control pill greatly aided women”s struggle for autonomy and fulfillment. The male birth control pill will also create great changes, but these changes will not be to some women”s liking. Be careful what you ask for–you might get it.”

From Sara Feldkamp’s Male Birth Control Pill and Digestive Health Top List of New Medical Discoveries, AAPS Annual Meeting and Exposition Kicks-Off in San Diego:

“New research presented at the 2007 American Association of Pharmaceutical Scientists Annual Meeting and Exposition indicates that a new oral option for men to prevent pregnancy may be possible. The study shows the efficacy and side-effects of an oral contraceptive for males, which is similar to birth control pills currently available for women.

“To date, effective male contraception has been restricted to physical methods, namely condoms and vasectomy. However, the research conducted by scientists at GTx, Inc., the Ohio State University, and the University of Tennessee provides the first male oral contraceptive that has been found effective in preventing pregnancy.

“Additionally, the option is reversible: after the medication is stopped, fertility is fully restored.

“For 13 years, these researchers have been examining the reversibility of a compound that inhibits infertility by utilizing a non-steroidal hormonal therapy known as a selective androgen receptor modulator.

“‘Past clinical studies using testosterone for male contraception were not effective at preventing pregnancy without producing significant negative side- effects,’ said James Dalton, Ph.D., AAPS Fellow and lead researcher at GTx, Inc. and the Ohio State University.

“‘Our recent study was doubly successful because it completely and reversibly inhibited fertility without unwanted side-effects.’

“In fact, the study proved that this male pill had positive effects on muscle and bone. Clinical trials are expected to begin in one to two years.”

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Postcards from Splitsville (Part IV)

The drawing above was taken from Kara Bishop’s www.postcardsfromsplitsville.com. Bishop works with Children of Divorce, a class run by Tucson, Arizona-based Divorce Recovery. The class did an art project that included “sending away” the frustrations of divorce. The website is a place where Kara says “children can share their divorce-related feelings anonymously and parents can get a new perspective on how this life-changing experience impacts their children”s lives.”

To learn more, click here. Kara can be reached at Kara@PostcardsfromSplitsville.com.

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NPO in the media

His Side with Glenn Sacks Radio Commentary: Army Dad Comes Back from Iraq to Visit Kids, Is Jailed for Child Support

December 18, 2007

My recent His Side with Glenn Sacks radio commentary for KLAA AM 830 in Los Angeles discusses the case of Aaron O’Connor, a father serving with the 3rd Infantry Division in Iraq who came back to the United States to visit his two daughters and ended up in jail over a small, questionable child support arrearage. To listen to the commentary, click here. To learn more, see Welcome Home, Soldier–Dad Comes Back from Army in Iraq to Visit His Daughters, Is Jailed for Child Support. His Side with Glenn Sacks radio commentaries are broadcast daily on KLAA AM 830, a 50,000 watt talk station in Los Angeles and Orange County. KLAA AM 830 is owned by Arte Moreno, owner of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. KLAA hosts include Glenn Beck and Michael Savage. From 2003-2005, His Side with Glenn Sacks ran in a syndicated talk show format in Los Angeles, New York City, Boston, Seattle, and other cities. To listen to show archives, click here. [audio:http://glennsacks.com/hsrc/mp3/hsrc-welcomehome.mp3]